Men and Friendship. by bigplew
April 25, 2007, 11:27 am
Filed under: Roles and Relationships

by Mike Plewniak

I just read a great article on Boundless Webzine by Thabiti Anyabwile called “Men and Friendship”. If you get a chance you should read it.

Here are some highlights:

“Perhaps the greatest inhibition to deep friendships among men is this scary “I” word: intimacy. What man doesn’t get slightly clammy and light-headed at the mention of the word — especially when the object of intimacy is another man! The word itself has been so associated with femininity that it seems to be the direct opposite of manliness or masculinity. And yet, the Scriptures hold out plentiful examples of deep friendship between men without even the hint of the feminization of men. In other words, the problem with intimacy between men is in our heads, not rooted in reality.”

“Friends share the meaningful. They take the courageous risk of becoming transparent, sharing burdens, hopes, joys, fears, failures, triumphs, questions, and resolutions.”

“Friendship either powerfully strengthens or corrupts our worship of God. So godliness in our deep friendships is essential.”

And finally, here are some application questions at the end of the article:

“1. Is this person God’s friend? (James 2:23)
2. Can I share meaningful things with this person?
3. Is my unwillingness to share connected with a character fault in the other or in myself (fear, distrust, etc)?
4. Am I being too passive in the cultivation of meaningful friendships? If so, how will I change this pattern of behavior?
5. Am I making myself available to other men for godly friendship?”

P.S. There is also a great article on Lust and the Disintegrating Power of Evil. Warning: This article is not for the faint-hearted.


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