Manspeak


Is Chivalry Dead? by Kevin Shipp
May 15, 2007, 7:16 am
Filed under: Humor, Uncategorized

It ain’t in Knoxville…well…sorta. A few weeks ago, our good buddy Todd proved that men still possess a passion to protect and honor women.

For those who don’t know Todd, here’s a quick description: He’s full of fire. The energy contained in all of the world’s coffee (that’s been consumed in all of history and ever will be consumed in the future)does not compare to the passion that flows through this man’s veins. He’s in the military and spent a little over a year in Afghanistan as a medic. He’s even been described as having a “strong back and a weak mind.” To sum it up, Todd is a psycho.

Todd and Walt were picking up some stuff from a house that several young ladies from our church live in. Over the years, one of the girls’ neighbors has complained and fussed about cars being parked on the street, people turning around in his drive way and noise, etc. Typical neighborhood complaints. Well, as they were leaving, Todd and Walt turned around in this dude’s driveway. As they were driving away, Todd noticed that the neighbor was walking across the street toward the girls’ house. Breaks, Reverse, Stop, Out…Todd was on it! Todd “calmly” approached the man saying something like, “Hey, man my names Todd…” while sticking his hand out to shake. Immediately, the guy became very defensive and started running back to his house saying, “What? You wanna fight me? You wanna fight?” Now, according to Todd, this reaction from the man was completely ridiculous, but I don’t think that is totally true. Todd can be an intimidating guy. When Todd is passionate about something and has a set goal in mind, his walk and demeanor…well, if you’ve ever seen Terminator 2, think about the scene where T1000, the shape shifting hooligan, is chasing the car…so I think the man might have been behaving appropriately. At any rate, Todd’s response could be compared to that of a rabid dog. You know how some dogs, if approached and treated with care and gentleness, will lick you and wag its tail and basically worship you, but if you run from them or approach them in a threatening way, they will rip your face off or run after you barking? That’s what Todd is like.

So, as the guy scurried back to his door, threatening to call the cops, Todd barked after him with finger pointing, “You’re not gonna mess with those girls!” Again, even louder and meaner, “You’re not gonna mess with those girls!”

Here’s to you, Todd, for loving your sisters and protecting them, even if it does require that you completely snap!

Kevin

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8 Comments so far
Leave a comment

The man called the cops anyways…apparently he wasn’t scared enough of Todd.

Comment by Jillian

good grief Charlie Brown

Comment by psteele

Hey Jill, he called the cops for fear of his own life

Comment by TMT

That’s insanity!!!

Comment by Chris Melander

I’ve also called the cops on Todd a couple of times…sometimes his passion can be used for good, sometimes for evil.

Comment by bigplew

He also yelled at me!! I didn’t even do anything.

Comment by Mary

What kind of dude is this? He waits till the guys pull off and then goes over to yell at the women?! Good on ya Todd!

Comment by tmaples

Can someone explain what “Good on ya Todd!” is supposed to mean?

Comment by Kevin Shipp




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