Manspeak


No pain, no gain by Kevin Shipp
October 23, 2007, 10:05 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

It was an accident. It happened so suddenly, and it changed my life forever. Oh, the trauma! Oh, the despair! I broke a toe!

That’s right. On Sunday, October 21st at 7:24pm, I broke the next to smallest toe on my left foot. I have whined, limped, and whimpered for days. This made me curious: Are guys really tougher than girls? It could just be that I am a huge weenie, but breaking a toe hurt BIG TIME! I was seriously worthless for a considerable amount of time. Yet women walk the planet for nine months with another human being growing in side of them and then go through hours of intense labor and delivery, and are chipper and going to concerts, working out, and working in like 36 hours. Men, if I am any indicator as to the physical rigor of our gender, and I may not be, we need to toughen up if we’re going to fulfill our God given call to lead, provide for, and protect the women in our lives. As it stands now, they are in big trouble! So, guys, share your thoughts. Also, what are some hilarious injuries you have suffered? What have been some hilarious reponses to injuries (good chance to cultivate humility there)? What about serious injuries?

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6 Comments so far
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The story goes:
I was putting a cat in a cage to get rid of said cat. The cat started flipping out and starting wedging its body under the cage to squeeze out. I grabbed the cat behind the head (with gloves), and it turned its head 180 degrees and bit a chunk out of my thumb through the glove. At which point the cat had managed to “rip” out of the cage, so I punted the beast and my dog ran after it.

As a boy, I had a table land on my big toe and I lost the toe nail…it grew back.

Comment by Squatty

Well, I had a cinder block drop on my big toe, thus tearing the nail off. Also, 2 weeks ago, I went over 6 or 7 very large boulders, down a steep hill with a golf cart. I was left with severe bruising on my leg, head, and chest. However, it was the most amazing thing I have ever done!!

Comment by David Reynolds

Kev – I think men are more incapacitated by some types of pain than others. For instance, I can handle broken bones (of which I’ve had 14 or 15 from various injuries) and cuts requiring stitches (I’ve logged somewhere around a total of 70 stitches so far) but a simple headache makes me want to curl up and die. Maybe your weakness is toes.

Some interesting injury causing accidents I’ve experienced: having a iron dropped on my head, putting my arm through glass doors and windows (some on accident, some on purpose), getting run over by a tractor, falling 35 feet in a rappelling accident, getting hit in the eye at point-blank range with a racquetball.

Comment by JM

JM

Wow. My advice to you is to seal yourself in a padded room away from anything that could be remotely dangerous. Being so accident prone makes you a danger to yourself and all you come within 30 feet of…

Comment by Kevin Shipp

I broke my hand at my gym, and it made a sound which could be heard around the gym, I didn’t think it was broken so I decided to finish up practice, I found out later that finishing up practice hurt it even more.

Comment by Justin

I almost cut my thumb off with a hand sickle. My folks didn’t like for us to use modern tools so I was left to cut down tall weeds with a hand sickle, you know the kind on the Soviet flag.

My stepdad said I came in the house with the gash and he told me to run some water over it at which time he turned it on full blast over the wound at which time I almost passed out.

On another occasion I was digging up rocks with a pick axe, I missed the rock on one of the swings and dug the pick into my shin.

Comment by Travis




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